There’s a stereotype that a wedding is just for women. The bride wants to do all the work and make all the decisions and it’s not the groom’s responsibility but to show up and say the right name in the right spot. I hate this stereotype. (I also hate the stereotype that marriage is punishment and that all men hate being married. Pro tip: If you don’t want to be married, don’t be married.)
When you live together, or even if you live in the same city or region, planning your wedding is stressful, but you still do it together. You visit venues together, taste food together, and pick out your cake flavours together. But when you live hundreds of miles apart, it gets a lot more difficult.
My future husband and I met online over seven years ago. We became fast friends and fast partners. It would be a year and a half until we would meet for the first time. It would be five and a half more years of our relationship before we would live in the same time zone.
We still don’t live in the same city (or even the same country for that matter), but we’re working it out. He can’t always go to meetings and consultations with me, but he’s always waiting to hear about them when I get back. We have to be sure to plan our photoshoots on weekends we’re both free to travel and make the most of the limited time we have together.
Is it difficult living so far apart while planning our wedding? Of course it is. But I also wouldn’t trade our relationship for anything. Being in an LDR for so long has showed me how important clear communication is. We’re stronger now than we’ve ever been thanks to years of relying on Skype to say our goodnights.